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Schwag
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German Insects & Flowers
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Sexiest, oh
I thought you said sexy.


Sooo choosy, and yet sooo insecure.


My urge for artistic self expression is locked
in a constant battle,
with all that built up hostility
inside a small wooden box
exposed to the weather.
Isolate the nagging pain
and form it into a little ball,
easy to handle
then stuff it in that wooden box as well.


The heat left me sweatier than a warthog belly during intercourse.


Not only is it worrisome how many stupid people exist.
What really scares me is how often I catch myself
with some ridiculous opinion.


On runnning a company:
If you don't do everything yourself you lose out on the fun part.
All you get stuck with is the un-fun parts and the trouble everybody dumps on you.


Art is about not having any choice except producing art.
I have no choice trying to produce my masterpiece, my slightly ridiculing, all-encompassing classifier.
My kids should not be known as the guys whose father masturbates in front of the computer all day long.


Anything you say or do, can and will be documented and posted on my website and used for the amusement of the general public.


I always thought that I am very much tuned to conceptual continuity.
Then I realized that I just do the same things over and over again because I forgot that I did them before.


The best thing about traveling in a group is that you can split anytime.


Not every smile is good for you.


Present the extraordinary and weird in a visually pleasant way and you'll be successful.


Compromise without giving in.


Andy, remember you are losing your mind.
"Funny I don't remember."


During a blowjob, is the girl the sucker and the guy the suckee
or the other way around?
I would suggest to call the guy the suckee.
But in employment, the employee is the one who does all the work.


Plants will always be superior to even the best sculpture because they live and grow.
They don't get drab after a while.


Soon my secret cabinet won't be high enough to be out of the reach of my son.
I guess when he becomes tall enough to reach my porn magazines and the dope stash he is probably old enough to handle it.


If you plan your pleasure around beer and women
you will get beer and women.
Plan your pleasure around some productive stuff.


My main reason for wanting to get famous is
that far fewer famous people are dying every day
than normal ones.


There is a big difference between
conceptual continuity
and doing the same thing over and over again.
There is also a big difference between
conceptual continuity
and having forgotten that you actually did something already before
like I do all the time.


Few people know that calamari are made out of the assholes of whale sharks
The pity is that you have to carve up so many whale sharks just to get one plate full of calamari.


Many times when people think they are in love, they are actually just curious and insecure.


First I conceptualize an idea.
That idea has to rest and ripen.
After a while I make a sketch or model depending what kind of art it is.
That again has to ripen.
Then I create the actual artwork which is a process over several days sometimes even weeks. Then I distance from it for a while.
Finally I work on the documentation (like my website or an art show) then I try to figure out what it could mean because somebody might ask.


The great thing about being arrogant is that you don't care if you are.


You can document anything.
Of course it is easy to go to places and thoughts where nobody dared to venture before.
If the documentation is fantastic, it could become an excursion by itself and the subject doesn't have to be very deep.
In other words a great artist can document everything how ever trivial it might appear.
You probably live at the edge of civilization anyway so just document the things around you.


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The Art of Andy Maluche - copyright

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